As a single mom who has been through two serious post-divorce relationships, my list of qualities I wanted in man was detailed. Let's just say I was very clear on what I wanted after being with people who were not worthy. If you know me well, it will not be shocking to hear that I was methodical, organized, and vigilant when it came to developing my list. He had to have a center core of integrity, be a phenomenal father very active in the lives of his children, with matched energy and crazy to me. The lucky guy was also going to want to build a life with me, both as a couple and with our children. I wanted someone who was thoughtful, considerate and who would take care of me as a woman and partner with me in life. I know he would have to be mighty special to pull off the balance and I was not going to settle again.
For as detailed as my list was I had no idea that "he must speak the words 'honey I want to get your tires rotated'" would ever be on my list. When my man recently spoke those words, a light went off my head signalling another little gem in him and a quality I wanted. He went further to explain why my tires needed roating, something about treads and the snow, and all that was lost as if one of the parents from Peanuts was speaking. I was fixated on the message.
I am very independent with a fierce Type A personality. But in my personal life I like chivalry, holding hands, and some traditional relationship roles. I want to be treated like an equal but also like a princess. He must also applaud and appreciate the skills I have and realize that there are some things I just do not like to take care of in life - like my car. In that one little sentence he showed his concern for my safety, care of my vehicle, and his ability to take care of me in an area of my life I could care less about.
For as detailed as my list was I had no idea that "he must speak the words 'honey I want to get your tires rotated'" would ever be on my list. When my man recently spoke those words, a light went off my head signalling another little gem in him and a quality I wanted. He went further to explain why my tires needed roating, something about treads and the snow, and all that was lost as if one of the parents from Peanuts was speaking. I was fixated on the message.
I am very independent with a fierce Type A personality. But in my personal life I like chivalry, holding hands, and some traditional relationship roles. I want to be treated like an equal but also like a princess. He must also applaud and appreciate the skills I have and realize that there are some things I just do not like to take care of in life - like my car. In that one little sentence he showed his concern for my safety, care of my vehicle, and his ability to take care of me in an area of my life I could care less about.
Yes, I realize, most girls are swept off their feet by a guy when he sends her flowers, or takes her out for a nice dinner. Some women like expensive gifts and vacations and grandiose gestures they believe equal love. I'm not about the expensive gestures...at all. Others have tried to buy me and, well it didn't work for them at all, in fact it was insulting. For me, and at my core, its about the true feeling of caring and spending time together - one of my favorite things to do with my guy is the 10 mile bike loop around a local lake. Cost = zippo, meaning = priceless. Getting my tires rotated was under $20.
If you are divorced and out there looking for your special someone, make sure your list is clear in qualities you want in a mate. As the relationship builds make sure you listen for your own version of "honey, I want to get your tires rotated." When you hear the phrase your heart will jump a bit.
If you are divorced and out there looking for your special someone, make sure your list is clear in qualities you want in a mate. As the relationship builds make sure you listen for your own version of "honey, I want to get your tires rotated." When you hear the phrase your heart will jump a bit.
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