Friday, October 11, 2013

Block that Ex Right out of Your Life

You break-up, there may be tears or cheers, you may be devastated or thrilled.  Moving on may seem impossible or you may be sprinting towards your new life.  Regardless of the situation, blocking your ex is a great idea.  When my friends break-up with significant others they call me to help them through the process. As a social media consultant I know the ins and outs of privacy settings on LinkedIn, Google+, Twitter Facebook and can walk them through the process.  I also speak from personal experience that a great feeling of peace can be achieved, when you make the decision to block and ex.  Some ex's make it easy by creating chaos in your emotional space through hurtful emails and text messages.   Trust me, when they can no longer find you through these channels because you have taken action to protect yourself, well that is a very freeing experience.

So, when you have made the commitment to block the sucker, here are a few suggestions:

The Cell phone
In today's modern world the cell phone presents a unique set of challenges at the end of a relationship.  More than likely you have become accustomed to constant communication with your now ex through texting and maybe even phone calls.  Time to shut down that option.  All service providers have a plan where you can block a person from connecting with you on your cell phone.  Usually you have to call in to set-up the feature and then you control the blocking online.  There is usually a charge.  I just learned that the iphone has a feature accessible through contacts screen to block an individual for free.

Mark Zuckerberg has set-up to ways for you to block a person on Facebook.  First, just go to their Facebook Timeline, click on the gear and then on Report/Block.  You can also click on the gear in the upper right hand corner of your own page, click on privacy settings, then blocking on the left side of the page.  Here you can enter a name and even the email addresses of people you want to block.

I use Gmail which requires a filter system for you to handle unwanted incoming emails.  You can choose for emails to be automatically deleted or you can funnel them to a filter if you feel you may need to periodically check the correspondence being sent to you.

Sounds ridiculous to block someone from Twitter but trust me, take the extra step.  Go to the page of the twitter account you wish to block, click on the icon of the head (right next to the follow/unfollow button on the right hand side) and then the option to block is in that menu.

Google Plus
Visit his/her profile, and to the right of the name (on the same line as their name), is an arrow.  Clicking on the arrow will display a menu where blocking is an option.

You can not block someone on LinkedIn.  You have two options:  Hide your profile from the public (I do not suggest this) or remove them as a connection (the way to go).  On the top navigation bar click networks then contacts.  Your list of connections will show on the screen.  Find your ex, click on the More down arrow on his/her page, and click on remove connection.

If you had a standard dating relationship and just wish to be done with the person, then go ahead and block. However, if you suffered emotional abuse which is continuing into your post-break-up relationship then you may want to consult legal counsel on how to handle the communications you receive.  They may be needed in the future.  When one of my relationships ended I had to consult counsel because the barrage of emails and degrading text messages would not stop.  Do not be ashamed, go ahead and protect yourself.

In my own personal life I have learned that you can really not move forward when you are still connected, even just in cyberspace, to another person.  Block your ex, make the commitment to keep the block, and then move forward into the amazing life you were destined to live.

No comments:

Post a Comment